Recently, a pertinent question surfaced during an Ownership Spirit® seminar I was teaching to a group of leaders. One leader asked, “How do you help people elevate their presets about themselves.”
Anyone who is parent, youth advisor, or team leader at work knows the scenario behind the question. We all know people who are under-performing—not because they lack the ability but because they lack the confidence. They underestimate their own capability to venture into new dimensions and take on more responsibility.
This discussion provided the opportunity to emphasize another key distinction regarding Tough-Minded Ownership. Tough-Minded Owners are able to stand up to sizable adversities in their lives because they adopt the habit of standing up to smaller ones on a day-to-day basis. Having built up a track record of overcoming certain obstacles, they gain the ability to face and surmount larger ones, including unexpected, near-catastrophic adversities.
Based on that rationale, I offer you a simple method or tool for helping others gain more confidence in themselves. I have dubbed it the
Creating Confidence Model:
1. Extend a specific challenge—an attainable stretch
(One size does not fit all in human relations. Focus on getting to know the inner person—the intentions, aspirations, fears, and current areas of confidence. Then assign a clearly defined task or responsibility suited to the inner person—one that requires a stretch.)
2. Monitor progress—but don’t hover
3. Offer input only when asked
4. Praise effort. Reward success.
Solid self-confidence and Tough-Minded Ownership are no flimsy mindsets. They are powerful, realistic states of mind built on the realism of previous successes. Just as the biblical David had confidence that he could slay Goliath because he had previously strengthened his faith through prior victories over a lion and a bear, each of us extends the boundaries of our confidence one modest venture—one additional degree—at a time.